Magic: The Gathering | Fantasy
Magical Thinking: Kaldheim
Welcome back to Magical Thinking, a look back at the cards and art of Magic: the Gathering, set by set, from the beginning, all through the eyes of a casual fan. This week we continue our count down to the present with the February 2021 (little over a year ago) set Kaldheim.
Everyone’s favorite ghost-capitalist slaying planeswalker assassin (Okay, my favorite, but she should be your favorite too) Kaya is in Kaldheim, a land of snow and prophecy and epics and gods, all based on Norse mythology. Kaldheim is actually ten realms, all connected by a world tree and each with its own different race of peoples; from humans to dwarves, elves to giants, demons to zombies, trolls to shapeshifters, angels to spirits. It’s also a realm ruled over by a bunch of different gods.
Of course, Kaya isn’t there alone. Our old pal Tibalt is out and about making mischief. And it’s not just them, because Kaya is hunting the most dangerous game, an enemy who might be distressingly familiar to anyone who has been following this series. But enough about that. Let’s throw on our snow shoes and dive right in.
This is it, this is the rock that Killer Croc threw at Batman. A rare collectors item indeed.
Anyways, here we have one of the new mechanics of the set. Boast is an ability that can only be activated after you attack with a creature. I really like the flavor here; a lot of time after a creature attacks, they usually end up dying, either from being blocked or otherwise removed. If they do survive, they will have something to be chuffed about. And it fits with the viking theme. Vikings love telling tales of their victories.
Dwarves do not mess around. Probably not coincidentally, Rugal Bernstein was recently announced as free DLC for the newest KOF game (He was a bad guy who liked to do this to fighters he defeated in battle).
The Doomskar is a phenomenon in Kaldheim where two different realms will crash together and kind of bleed together for a bit, which generally leads to open warfare between the two realms for as long as the connection lasts. Kaldheim seems like an amazing setting, and I want a DnD setting book for it one day.
Our other new mechanic, foretell, lets you exile a card for two mana, and then play it for its reduced foretell cost later. Basically, you pay part of the cost now, and the rest later. I thought it was a fun ability. Hopefully we will see it again in the future.
And here we have the first of the Kaldheim gods. Unlike the gods of other realms, they aren’t bound by specific restrictions, they can attack freely unlike the Amonkhet gods, and they don’t require worshipers to sustain them like the Theros gods. As a downside, they’re pretty much mortal and very kill-able. But you may notice that this is a double sided card, so let’s see what’s on the other side.
Yep, every God has a flip side where they get an associated weapon or other divine artifact. And as you can see, equipping this card to Halvar would give him some immortality.
You know you love to see her work. I know I do.
Here’s our second god. I’m not 100% sure but I’m pretty sure each color gets two mono colored gods, but we will see what the final roster is.
Oh, and this card spoils another aspect of this set: Snow lands. The last time we saw them were way back in Coldsnap, but here they are again, new snow lands for a new generation of Magic players.
So, let’s see what Reidane’s associated artifact is:
Probably not a lot of protection in the grand scheme of things, but that one damage and 1 extra mana can mean the difference between victory and defeat.
Oh, we also got runes! Runes can enchant creatures or equipment. I like the flavor of the later. It’s like you’re enchanting your equipment.
What’s better than one angel now? A lot of angels later. Foretell this bad boy, then unleash the angel army (Of course technically they are Valkyries but for our purposes they are angels).
Okay, I take it back, not all of the gods have artifacts on the other side. Some of them have birds. Of course, considering this is the setting’s Odin equivalent, it makes sense for him to have a raven.
I really love monsters you can level up, and this one may be the best because they go from a 1/1 to a 2/3, then an angel, then a bigger angel. So they remain useful at all points of a game. Also, if you need a reminder, that symbol means you need mana from snow lands to play the effect.
Speaking of snow mana. Also, giants. Love me some giants, and what Norse myth-themed setting would be complete without giants? As mentioned before, giants were always a favorite of mine, so I was rocking a giant Izzet deck when this set came out.
I really like the flavor of Cosima going on long voyages and coming back wiser (and stronger) based on the lands you have visited along the way. And of course she has a giant boat as her associated artifact.
As mentioned, there are ten realms in Kaldheim, each is associated with a different race, and also two colors. Zombies in Kaldheim are Draugr, and are associated with Blue and Black. More on them later.
This guy won me a game once, based solely on their ability. Never underestimate a hungry yeti I guess.
Of course, it wouldn’t be Blue without a kraken, and this one is the biggest and scariest yet (And you may recall blue has a LOT of big kraken). Of course, the colder it gets, the further out in the icy water you go, the more likely you are to find one, so ice fish with care.
Kaldheim also has shapeshifters, which makes for a great opportunity to reintroduce changeling, the ability that gives a creature every creature type. We last saw this in Lorwyn/Shadowmoor, which also had a strong tribal theme. Changeling is useful since you can slot these guys into any other tribal deck as needed.
Because sometimes you’re just like, “Nope, be a bird now.”
Now you too can pretend to be an insufferable genius from an anime and pretend to predict your opponent’s every move. Next you’re gonna say “Oh but I would never do that.” Let me know if I actually got you with that one.
Like I said, each creature type is pulling double color duty this set, so elves are branching into Black as well as Green (Heh, branching. Heheh, duty).
Oh yeah, I remember this guy. His thing is that no one respects him because he looks like an emo teen instead of a god of death. I mean, the Hot Topic is strong with this guy.
Game of Thrones intensifies.
I also like how each artifact or creature compliments the corresponding god; You need to keep exiling cards from your graveyard to keep Egon out, and his throne mills your own cards to keep your graveyard full.
Wow, I must have missed this card when I was still playing. I love the art here, and of course the reference to Jormugandr (Spelling probably incorrect).
*Gasp* The purple stuff! The Sunny D commercials were trying to warn us.
Tergrid is fun because she’s actually perfectly nice but just intensely creepy (Also the whole killer shadow thing). I played her a bit, but mainly used her artifact side, which can really wear an enemy down depending on how much you are willing to use it.
Welp, looks like I was wrong after all. There are three Black Gods chiming in, with Valki being our Loki equivalent. BUT WAIT! Let’s see who that god really is!
Jinkies! It’s Tibalt. I have to say, Tibalt has come a long way from being considered the most useless planeswalker to having a card like this, and also basically shoving the real Valki into a closet and taking over their identity to do shenanigans. Tibalt started from the bottom, and now he’s here.
Birgi is telling the story of when she caught a fish THIS BIG. Also true to her status as a storyteller and rabble-rouser, she lets you boast more than once.
Red draws extra cards in two ways; by discarding first, and by exiling cards and letting you play them that turn before you lose them. And this card combines them both.
Because sometimes you just need to hit everything with a big fist. I approve.
You know they always got to sneak in one or two cute cards, and I always appreciate them. Look at the little pupper! Isn’t he a toughie? Yes he is.
Demons are the Red/Black Kaldheim race. They do look pretty cool, don’t they?
So, Kaldheim does have its own version of Reddit. So…much…DISCOURSE. *Shudders*
…Okay, I have no idea who this is supposed to be. Someone help me out please?… OH OF COURSE. IT’S THE INCREDIBLE HULK. IT’S SO OBVIOUS.
Into the Spiderverse, Kaldheim edition. It’ll go well with the Captain America card we just covered.
I’m pretty sure I encountered a deck once that was this bridge and then every god and other legendary that player had. This is just the “Let me show you how many legendary cards I have” card.
Speaking of decks I saw, way too many decks made up of this guy and a bunch of deathtouch creatures. So very annoying, so very cheap.
…Sorry, still not as cool as that guy from Tarkir who punched a bear. This is a good effort though.
I wonder why his artifact is Blue Black while he is Green?
Here’s another card for decks who want to show off how many legendary creatures they’ve accumulated.
And here we have one of our new planeswalkers. Tyvar is a big beefy heroic elf who loves protecting his people and competing with others. Kind of like a famous Marvel character based on Norse myth we all know and love. Wait. WAIT. NOW I GET IT. Torlaf is meant to be…EGO THE LIVING PLANET! *gets tackled*
And now we know what Kaya was hunting. Yep, it’s Vorinclex, who is on Kaldheim and is working together with Tibalt (And by working together I mean implanted a Phyrexian seed in Tibalt) to do some nefarious doings. How did he get there? What other Phyrexians are traveling abroad? Questions for later. On a personal note I loved playing with this guy as a commander in Brawl. His counter power is so OP it’s amazing.
And we got more sagas! You remember sagas, those enchantments that only last three turns but keep doing stuff throughout. Of course a set based on the culture that gave us Beowulf would have their own sagas, and rendered in beautiful woodcut style no less.
And there’s Kaya again, using her ghostform powers to keep your cards safe and to send her enemies to the shadow realm (might as well be, right?).
Of all the tribal chieftains in this set, Narfi is probably my favorite because he’s a lich, because I love zombies in Magic, and because his effect is cool since once he’s out he’s pretty much unkillable.
Niko is the last new planeswalker of the set, and a personal favorite. Niko is the first nonbinary character created for Magic (and no, I don’t count Ashiok, who is genderless in the “I have forsaken my humanity and become a living nightmare” way, where is Niko is nonbinary in that they are nonbinary, like a real life person can be). Niko also has the best origin ever; They were an athlete who was foretold to never lose a game, so they were like “eff that” and intentionally threw a game, defying fate, pissing off Klothys, and becoming a planeswalker. Pretty sweet deal for them overall.
I wonder if carving ice menhirs is the troll equivalent of crochet?
See, I live in Western New York, so when I think colossal plow my brain goes in an entirely different direction. But then we probably do get more snow than this place does (And I say this when this is the set that brought back Snow Lands after literal decades of absence).
What’s better than a mana rock? A mana rock that becomes eight mana rocks. I’m pretty sure this is a reference to another Norse myth but I forget specifically which one. Ah well. *Lord of the Rings intensifies*
This is a new development I think; dual color snow lands. Exactly the kind of thing this set needs.
And keeping with what we had last time, more double sided dual lands.
Of course we have to end on this card, because it literally brings the entire setting together.
And now that we have thoroughly explored Kaldheim, it’s time to take it easy for a while, but not too easy of course. Next week, school will be back in session. Get your sylabus ready and buy all your books and instant ramen, because we’re going to the best wizard school in the land (one that was not created by an antisemitic TERF). Yes, next week we head to Strixhaven, School of Mages. But until then, Stay Magical.
